(I'm writing this straight into the neocities page editor because I don't care)
Approaching day 3 without my quetiapine. I'm not having big scary outbursts like I kind of expected, but everything feels a little... off. The world feels a bit torn and distant from itself.
On the other hand, I'm surprisingly... fine. Active. Inspired. They say that atypical antipsychotics are basically sedatives, and it's true. I know I sound like that typical trope of "crazy person thinks they're so much better off their meds, but really they're just crazy again." I'll own it.
It's not without problems, though. I've been unable to sleep - surprise, surprise. Though I think it has just as much to do with an upset stomach the first night and my rash flaring up last night... that was bad. The skin was blistered the next morning. I tried putting on topical Benadryl and it hurt like hell.
I drank a Monster today but then didn't do much work or even play video games. With nowhere for the focus to go, it feels like my body might break. I don't usually react this strongly to the caffeine... is it the lack of meds? Or the stress?
It feels like I have a million stories to tell, things to draw, performances to do, essays to write. But every time I scratch the surface and try to do them, something breaks. Return: error
Return: error
Return: error
I'll return to normal eventually.